I am dusting off the cobwebs of this blog. I have had a post rolling around my head for months. Now that I am on the eve of meeting Baby Nelson #3 I am finally taking the time to write it. As Jon and I prayed about what God would have for our family we both have felt complete peace about having three biological kids. After a 2.5 year struggle conceiving Alea I thought we would never have to face the roller coaster and heartbreak of infertility. Don’t get me wrong I know God taught me so much in that journey leading up to Alea and also gave me the opportunity empathize and ministry to other woman facing the same thing. However, I thought that journey was over in the past especially when Nehemiah was not a struggle to have. When Jon and I decide to start trying for baby 3 we quickly realized we found ourselves back on this roller coaster called infertility and I was pretty sure I just wanted to get off. I didn’t know if I was strong enough to ride the emotions. Why a roller coaster you ask? Well with infertility you are broken up in segments in a given month. You have highs and lows. The first few weeks you are resolved this will be the month, you are hopeful and determine to make it work. Then you hit the “window” and try your best to make sure everything you know to do is done. Then you hit the dreaded waiting weeks. These might be the hardest because your mind plays tricks on you. Anything that happens out of a norm makes you think this is it, your pregnant. You start to question everything and you can’t help yourself you are hopeful and even dare I say dreaming of what maybe. Then the waiting ends. Every trip to the bathroom you wonder will this be the good news or bad. If it’s the bad and you in fact are not pregnant you are crushed. I mean truly crushed. You wonder what you did wrong. You wonder what is wrong with my body. You wonder am I pushing something that God doesn’t even want? You mourn for what could have been. You tell yourself you are getting off this ride it’s just not worth it. You cry. You get angry as it seems so easy for so many. You throw a tantrum (maybe that was just me). You work really hard to process all the emotions that overwhelming flood you. Then you start the accent to hopeful determine stage again. It’s not a fun ride. I beg you if you have a friend on this ride- love on them! So all this to say we were on that ride again. We decide to go back to the same Dr. we loved with Alea. We started some medicine to help with the process. This required me to see my doctor at a certain point in my cycle. In April I went to that check up and was not able to see my doctor so the doctor I did see what overly discouraging questioning the plan of actions and my need for another baby. I left there pretty discourage and even more so a few days later when I got the call telling me based on the blood work it was not possible for me to be pregnant that month. My doctor called me when he return from vacation. (How great to have a doctor that cares enough to make a personal call). I had been praying God would give me some encouragement that we were doing the right thing in pursuing this as I felt so unsure at that point. Our doctor encouraged me so much and was very affirmative that we would be able to get this figured out. I did ask “is it true that this month there is no way I can be pregnant”. He said “Heather it’s impossible”. I said “100% sure?” He said “I am sorry but it’s simply impossible”. As the weeks progressed I was missing the biggest indicator of being pregnant. One day I decide to take a home pregnancy test. Up to this point I had never had a positive one (other two had to have blood test to confirm). It came out positive. I was shocked. I showed Jon, he was confused. First I was told IMPOSSIBLE, second we have never had a positive home pregnancy test. I went and got another one and it too was positive. I was really pregnant. GOD MADE POSSIBLE WHAT WAS IMPOSSIBLE!!! This baby, this gift, was by no accident he or she was divinely given to us to bring God glory. We have already prayed this baby’s life would reflect that. Even though it has been my most demanding pregnancy I don’t want to forget the story of how this baby came to be. I don’t want to stop praising God for the miracle of this little one. I finally get to see his or her face tomorrow and I know Jon and I will be in worship to the one who gave us the impossible.
The Nelson Family Blog 
Heather, I”m in tears and also so happy after reading your blog. I had no idea what you were dealing with.This baby is truly blessed by God. I am so, SOOOO happy for you and for Jon. Good luck tomorrow. I pray that God will direct the doctors hands and the nurses hands and that baby with have all fingers and toes and be perfect! Just like in God’s image. I am so excited for the both of you! I was never able to have a second child due to medical reasons. To have that child of God, in your tummy is one of the most blessed and wonderful things God gave to woman. A man just doesn’t get the connection. Hugs and blessings sweetie!!!
I think that my biggest struggle was never getting pregnant. It was finally having the confirmation I was pregnant I founding out it didn’t have a heart beat. Loosing one is the biggest crusher of hope because the emptiness you feel when its gone remains. After each of my daughters was born I experienced this but only for a short window because then I got to hold them. With this past one I never got to truly hold it except in the moment I said goodbye…God can do the impossible. But a hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the blessing comes it is life to the bones. I cannot wait for the blessing to happen again for us. Congrats on yours!
Heather, Nate and I will be praying with you tomorrow as you get to welcome this new one into your life. What a blessing children are as you already know. I learned so much about God through them. My faith was grown and stretched by them. It still is being stretched by them. 🙂 I’m so glad your Mom gets to be there for you to. Is your Dad coming also? Have fun! Enjoy every moment.